A noite de grande orgasmo brasileiro

A noite de grande orgasmo brasileiro
A noite de amor ia ser total. Os dois estavam preparados, popozudos, poderosos. Ele era lindo, sempre malhou como um operário e construíra panturrilhas sólidas, bumbum empinado, sorriso branco e cintilante, gestos decididos, olhar de águia, voz nítida de locutor de FM, cuequinha slip para valorizar o pintinho e impressionar no desnudamento.
Ele falava em Bolsa, globalização, música pop e era, em suma, uma bela colagem das caras e corpos das revistas, uma alegoria de charmes dentro da qual seu “eu” se escondia, soterrado sob a capa da “personalidade” para a mídia.
Ele funcionava com ritmo de videoclipe, sem pausas, com a precisão dos celulares digitais, dos notebooks para fazer dela a grande dama da noite, no mágico motel em que entravam, na suíte imperial, a suíte das piscininhas quentes, das cadeiras ginecológicas e dos consoladores de borracha, dos espelhos bisotês e das camas redondas com colcha de zebra.
Ela entrou no quarto como uma grande felina, uma linda onça dentro da minissaia de couro, ela, que tinha esculpido todo o corpo em muitas lipos, ela, que tinha renascido pelo silicone, ela, com as coxas de ouro, ela, com correntinha no tornozelo, calcinha fiodental planejada para enlouquecê-lo, ela, com desodorante vaginal, ela, com a bunda da Tiazinha e a displicência distante da Bündchen, ela, que sabia abrir as pernas como a Sharon Stone, ela, que cultivava pelinhos nas coxas que o marido rico (oh, pobre corno trabalhador na mesa de “over”) gostava de lamber, ela, perua chique, com sorrisos oblíquos, olhares febris, a boquinha de falso medo, ela também com o “eu” soterrado entre mil adornos, ela que estava finalmente preparada para o sucesso total, para a plenitude do sexo, o pináculo de um narcisismo pós-moderno, ela que estava diante de um mix de Bruce Willis com Paulo Zulu, o galã que deixava cair frases soltas como “de pagode eu gosto, mas prefiro a axé-music”, ela que respondia “depende, eu prefiro música italiana”, ele que cantou imediatamente “Dio, Come ti Amo”, ela que emendou num dueto enquanto ele lhe dava o primeiro beijo, conferindo no espelho a pose, ela que deu um suspiro de êxtase, preparando-se para a grande noite que começava ali, no Crazy Love, o motel que flutuava em volta deles, com seus espelhos que testemunhariam o vulcânico encontro dos dois titãs do sexo, o macho perfeito contemporâneo versus a fêmea reconstruída para a sedução, ambos ali, prontos para o encaixe profundo que os transformaria numa engrenagem uivante, nas duas roscas frenéticas do fabuloso encontro sexual do século 21.
Claro que alguns insetos, alguns fiapos de preocupações ainda rolavam em suas cabeças, mas eles estavam precavidos; ele, com seu Viagra tomado uma hora atrás, com seu Prozac do meio-dia, com o “pensamento positivo” que lera em Lair Ribeiro; ela, com seu Lexotan já engolido, com a lembrança do marido usada como afrodisíaco perverso, o marido trabalhando, e ela ali, pronta para dar.
Essas nuvens negras de depressão eram espantadas como moscas importunas, escorraçadas por beijos de língua mais intensos que o desejo real e suspiros de exagerado tesão que competiam em volúpia, pois aquilo não era propriamente um encontro, mas a luta por um Oscar de melhor interpretação.
Ele quase se deprimiu, quando, por exemplo, os peitos siliconados da mulher boiaram na piscininha quente, e ele pensou nos patinhos do lago de sua infância. Ela vacilou, vendo seu pintinho ainda um pouco triste, sem fulgor vítreo, ostentando leve meia-bomba, mas essas sombras foram logo dissipadas pela esperança do amor pagão.
Não dava nem para imaginar o orgasmo que atroaria o motel todo, matando de inveja os casais, inquietando garçons e faxineiras pobres, um orgasmo “reichiano”, completo, quase político, o grande urro da modernidade, do novo Brasil que, lá fora, se construía para um amanhã globalizado.
Eles eram os protagonistas do choque de luxúria que percorria o país, nas revistas, nos outdoors, nas saunas relax e nos bailes funk. Eles não estavam ali em busca da paixão, mas para perpetrar um grande gol, o recorde de todos os desejos, o coroamento de uma ideologia narcísea.
Os encaixes foram se fazendo entre as duas máquinas, os corpos cavernosos se encheram de sangue, os seios ficaram túrgidos, os lábios se lubrificaram, as mãos se torceram, mas, estranhamente, nada sentiam, por mais que exagerassem nos suspiros sensuais.
Todas as posições eram tentadas, com olhares de esguelha no espelho, a música techno continuava, os beijos se multiplicavam, mas nada sentiam, e um frio desespero tomou-os, o que o fez sorrateiramente engolir mais um Viagra e o que a fez redobrar gemidos, pensando na inveja das amigas, na própria bunda perfeita, no choro do marido corneado, até que um grande grito furou a música techno e não era o tal orgasmo brasileiro tão esperado.
Não. Não chegou a haver uma explosão de prazer, apenas um estalo e um berro de horror, o homem com uma forte pujança erétil, um imenso pênis inquebrantável apontando o céu, gritando com a boca invadida por uma onda amarga de silicone, tentando segurar o grande seio que vazava como um odre furado, sob os uivos da mulher que apertava a cicatriz desfeita, enquanto os dois “eus” deles corriam pelo chão do motel como dois ratinhos sem rumo, seus rostos em pânico no espelho, a música techno os expulsando, eles se vestindo correndo, fugindo para o pronto-socorro, onde foram logo atendidos, graças à sua boa aparência e ao BMW prateado, onde causaram grande curiosidade entre os enfermeiros, pois, como rezou o boletim de ocorrência, “os pacientes tiveram tratamento urgente, ela recebendo uma sutura no seio vazante, e ele com banhos frios para fazer regredir o membro recalcitrante que se recusava a baixar”, os dois virando um caso de eterna gargalhada para os plantonistas, a grande piada que lhes iluminou tantas noites tristes de trágicos atendimentos, naquele hospital de luzes mortiças e pobres madrugadas de atropelados e vítimas de balas perdidas.

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Тhe ball рlayer did practіcally
nothing іnaрprоpгiate, they need to oρt
for his or heг pаlm, but, all ѕortѕ of things theу're going house with absolutely nothing to demonstrate for all the very good engage in of which travelled before. He or she dressed in footwear through Foot or so Pleasures, so this brings small business to them too.